Polarizing Choices

11-20-2010 [written 11-20-2010] FULL MOON!

Oh, how our big life choices polarize our community! There are those who support us in our quest - no matter how unreasonable....and then there are the other folks. The ones who think they know better what we need and "should" do. The ones who see us heart-to-heart, spirit-to-spirit....and the ones who operate from the mind and attempt to patronize us from the "ivory tower." To them, life must be controlled, must be "reasonable" at all costs, giving predictable, already-always outcomes. Observing their tight, fear-based, surgical-grade-controlled lives elics the same feeling as visiting a lion cage at the zoo [I could never do zoos for that very reason]. I really get where they are, as I've lived from a place of fear for most of my life - until a drastic health incident has knocked me flat into surrender, for no human could sustain that level of fear for any significan amounto of time. And, having been there, I know that no amount of reasoning can communicate the heart-based options to those trapped hopelessly in the mind. Such is the knowledge that can only be delivered viscerally.

In taking this journey, I see again who my true family is. They stand by me even if they think it's risky and sudden. They stand by me because they hear that indescribable note in the way I speak of something I simply have to do. That subtle conviction that is lost on the mind, but clear as diamonds to the heart. I feel fortunate to recognize that most people I care about have supported and encouraged me when they learned of my choice. The person who has surprised me the most was my Mama. Even though the news were brought to her last-moment, she has gracefully accepted it and has bid me goodbye with words of love and care: "May your path be blessed and may you always remember that you have me no matter what." These words still rang in my ears as I boarded the plane. My bow to you, Wise Woman!

Although I consciously intend to not put people through a "sieve" of this kind, in a way, this choice does serve as a filter for the people who "get me" and those who do not. I choose to travel with those who "see me" [think Avatar ;O)].

--

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